TIED AND BOUND
TIED AND BOUND turned 2 today!

TIED AND BOUND turned 2 today!

fortheloveofasub:

Determination
One of the things I find most incredibly erotic is the determination with which a submissive will undertake a task set forth by her Dom. It is then that the strength of her will and character, so freely and completely given to another, is most visually apparent. Her concentration, determination, and desire to see a task through to successful completion and in so doing please her Dom is palpable. The satisfaction in knowing just how proud her Dom is of her, not only for submitting to Him and the task he set forth, but in the exercise of her will against her own self is profound. The submissive needs her Dom to challenge her and draw out her submission. The Dom desires this submission above all else and worships the woman who can give it to him.
A Dominant wants to feel needed
A submissive needs to feel wanted
Apart they are empty shells
Together they are complete and whole
Watch the determination in her eyes as she strives to please and be pleasing and know that therein lies the heart of submission. Appreciate and treasure it for the priceless gift that it is.
Caption © For The Love of a Submissive, 2012
Image Credit Unknown

fortheloveofasub:

Determination

One of the things I find most incredibly erotic is the determination with which a submissive will undertake a task set forth by her Dom. It is then that the strength of her will and character, so freely and completely given to another, is most visually apparent. Her concentration, determination, and desire to see a task through to successful completion and in so doing please her Dom is palpable. The satisfaction in knowing just how proud her Dom is of her, not only for submitting to Him and the task he set forth, but in the exercise of her will against her own self is profound. The submissive needs her Dom to challenge her and draw out her submission. The Dom desires this submission above all else and worships the woman who can give it to him.

A Dominant wants to feel needed

A submissive needs to feel wanted

Apart they are empty shells

Together they are complete and whole

Watch the determination in her eyes as she strives to please and be pleasing and know that therein lies the heart of submission. Appreciate and treasure it for the priceless gift that it is.

Caption © For The Love of a Submissive, 2012

Image Credit Unknown

dancingonthefringe:

Your Submissive - Handle With Care!
I write often about the dance on the fringe of darkness - where the Dominant leads and the submissive anticipates and follows to the best of her ability.  With the right music, experience, motivation, chemistry, and trust - the result is breathtaking in its beauty, erotic intensity, and joy.
Here is the rub.  I have submissive friends who are hurt deeply by Dominants who see the relationship as only the dance.  These players work intensely, engage fully, and savor the bodies and attentions of their girls.  Yet, once they are sated - they communicate sparsely and only when pursued.  Some flirt online and make comments about other girls’ photos.  Others disappear entirely and remain shadows until their loins stir again.
"If He is that much of an asshole, why doesn’t she just leave?"
A slam-dunk - right?  The girl should recognize these patterns and move on to find a Dominant who truly understands and embraces his responsibility to love, nurture, care for, inspire, and support his submissive in all she does - right? 
Wrong.  The most tortuous aspect of these relationships is the way the Dominant draws the submissive in and immerses her in the amazing aspects of the dance.  He inspires her to give completely of herself and make herself vulnerable.  He preys on her submissive nature - her need to please and to feel loved and appreciated.  When pressed - he causes her to feel oppressive, disrespectful, and demanding.  Especially if she asks for the truly important caring and support necessary for a bond to thrive.
I have watched beautiful, intelligent, gifted, erotic, motivated girls become infatuated with the dance - fall in love - and be rendered blind to the potentially devastating aspects of neglect and insensitivity. 
Enough.
I doubt any players will ever read this - and I doubt they would pay me any attention if they did.  Perhaps I can encourage submissives in this situation to recognize the signs and take actions to protect their hearts and find fulfillment elsewhere. 
To any Dominant in a relationship who is devastating his girl with these behaviors:
If you have taken on a submissive as your own in a caring relationship, appreciate what it truly means to be a loving, supportive Dominant. 
When you accept a girl’s gift of herself - body, mind, heart, and soul - appreciate just what it takes for a girl to believe in you, love you, and trust you so completely. Only the best Dominants can truly appreciate the strength it takes to do this.  
Never - ever - take this for granted.  If you do - you will cause her to feel guilty, used, and vulnerable. Remember - you are not here just for the dance.  This is not only about great kink and sex whenever you feel like it.  
You are your girl’s guardian and the keeper of her heart.  Appreciate what you mean to her.  You are her Dominant or Master.  You may also be her teacher, mentor, adviser,  lover, coach, trainer, friend, confidant, dance partner, and soulmate.  
Your girl is ultimately responsible for her own happiness and fulfillment. You should inspire her, nurture her, and motivate her to be the best she can be in all she does.  
Never forget - you are your girls one true mirror.  She primps for you. She works out for you and wants to look her best for you.  She yearns to be your hunger, your passion, and your craving. She gives greatly of herself to be able to feel this.  
Be the reflection of this love and devotion.  Tell her all the ways she is beautiful to you.  Compliment her when she works so hard to please - both in the moment - and when you are apart.  Let her hear your sounds of joy - and let her always see the love and caring in your eyes.  
Be her Dominant - handle with care - and you will be blissfully happy.
© Fringe of Darkness, 2013with thanks to reilangel for this beautiful photo submission 

dancingonthefringe:

Your Submissive - Handle With Care!

I write often about the dance on the fringe of darkness - where the Dominant leads and the submissive anticipates and follows to the best of her ability.  With the right music, experience, motivation, chemistry, and trust - the result is breathtaking in its beauty, erotic intensity, and joy.

Here is the rub.  I have submissive friends who are hurt deeply by Dominants who see the relationship as only the dance.  These players work intensely, engage fully, and savor the bodies and attentions of their girls.  Yet, once they are sated - they communicate sparsely and only when pursued.  Some flirt online and make comments about other girls’ photos.  Others disappear entirely and remain shadows until their loins stir again.

"If He is that much of an asshole, why doesn’t she just leave?"

A slam-dunk - right?  The girl should recognize these patterns and move on to find a Dominant who truly understands and embraces his responsibility to love, nurture, care for, inspire, and support his submissive in all she does - right? 

Wrong.  The most tortuous aspect of these relationships is the way the Dominant draws the submissive in and immerses her in the amazing aspects of the dance.  He inspires her to give completely of herself and make herself vulnerable.  He preys on her submissive nature - her need to please and to feel loved and appreciated.  When pressed - he causes her to feel oppressive, disrespectful, and demanding.  Especially if she asks for the truly important caring and support necessary for a bond to thrive.

I have watched beautiful, intelligent, gifted, erotic, motivated girls become infatuated with the dance - fall in love - and be rendered blind to the potentially devastating aspects of neglect and insensitivity. 

Enough.

I doubt any players will ever read this - and I doubt they would pay me any attention if they did.  Perhaps I can encourage submissives in this situation to recognize the signs and take actions to protect their hearts and find fulfillment elsewhere. 

To any Dominant in a relationship who is devastating his girl with these behaviors:

If you have taken on a submissive as your own in a caring relationship, appreciate what it truly means to be a loving, supportive Dominant. 

When you accept a girl’s gift of herself - body, mind, heart, and soul - appreciate just what it takes for a girl to believe in you, love you, and trust you so completely. Only the best Dominants can truly appreciate the strength it takes to do this.  

Never - ever - take this for granted.  If you do - you will cause her to feel guilty, used, and vulnerable. Remember - you are not here just for the dance.  This is not only about great kink and sex whenever you feel like it.  

You are your girl’s guardian and the keeper of her heart.  Appreciate what you mean to her.  You are her Dominant or Master.  You may also be her teacher, mentor, adviser,  lover, coach, trainer, friend, confidant, dance partner, and soulmate.  

Your girl is ultimately responsible for her own happiness and fulfillment. You should inspire her, nurture her, and motivate her to be the best she can be in all she does.  

Never forget - you are your girls one true mirror.  She primps for you. She works out for you and wants to look her best for you.  She yearns to be your hunger, your passion, and your craving. She gives greatly of herself to be able to feel this.  

Be the reflection of this love and devotion.  Tell her all the ways she is beautiful to you.  Compliment her when she works so hard to please - both in the moment - and when you are apart.  Let her hear your sounds of joy - and let her always see the love and caring in your eyes.  

Be her Dominant - handle with care - and you will be blissfully happy.

© Fringe of Darkness, 2013

with thanks to reilangel for this beautiful photo submission 

fortheloveofasub:

See What I See
Look upon yourself and see what I see. Observe the strong and beautiful woman that I perceive as opposed to the collection of “imperfections” and differences you obsess over. See the whole, not the parts or even the sum of the parts. You are not an opportunity for change and improvement but a work of art, perfect in your own right, open to interpretation and appreciation by the beholder.
I, your Sir, am the beholder; see what I see.
Caption © For The Love of a Submissive, 2012
Image Credit Unknown

I try so hard to see myself this way,the way my Sir seyonne85 sees me. “I love you Sir!!”

fortheloveofasub:

See What I See

Look upon yourself and see what I see. Observe the strong and beautiful woman that I perceive as opposed to the collection of “imperfections” and differences you obsess over. See the whole, not the parts or even the sum of the parts. You are not an opportunity for change and improvement but a work of art, perfect in your own right, open to interpretation and appreciation by the beholder.

I, your Sir, am the beholder; see what I see.

Caption © For The Love of a Submissive, 2012

Image Credit Unknown

I try so hard to see myself this way,the way my Sir seyonne85 sees me. “I love you Sir!!”
fortheloveofasub:

Center of Attention
One of the appealing aspects of being a submissive is the attention that a Dom showers on their sub. It is often said that submissives require more attention and can be needier than the average person. This has been true in my experience but it is not necessarily a bad thing in the context of a D/s relationship. Indeed, it could be argued that the dependence a submissive feels on their Dom dovetails perfectly with the fact that at the heart of Dominance is a desire to be needed and looked to for support, guidance and security. In essence, the Dom needs to be needed. D/s is after all a symbiotic relationship between two people on many levels.
It has also been my observation that many submissives do not like being in the spotlight in any public sense and would rather slip into the background in a crowd rather the seek attention or adulation. Yet in private with their Dom, they are in point of fact very much in the spotlight. They are the sole focus of a Dominant’s attention, words and actions. The Dom’s world revolves around the sub for at least a time and the submissive revels in this attention and seeks still more in their efforts to serve and be pleasing. The glare of the white hot spotlight of their Dom is deeply appealing and gratifying to the submissive.
The term neediness is often used to describe a negative trait in a relationship, something that should be stamped out. And yet, in the context of a D/s relationship it is not always a bad thing at all. A Dom very much needs a submissive and a sub very much needs a Dom. Without the other, they cannot fulfill their desires or their destiny. They do not feel whole. However, if neediness is motivated by negative traits and emotions such as jealously, insecurity, or a fear of rejection, then neediness takes on a very negative connotation with consequent destructive impact on the relationship. It is always good to check your motives and guard against sabataging behaviors.
As a Dom, I like to be needed and I desire very much the attention and devotion that a submissive has to offer. I feed on that energy and return it in kind by devoting my full and undivided attention to my submissive in the form of acceptance, structure and loving control, giving her precisely what she needs in return. I can be just as needy as any submissive in my own way…it is simply expressed differently.
Where this all falls apart is when a so-called Dom enters into a D/s relationship under the belief that it is solely sexual in nature, seeking only the physical manifestations of BDSM without supporting the emotional and psychological aspects of the relationship. This is a recipe for disaster and heartbreak. A needy submissive might initially feel a sense of being accepted and supported during the sexual aspects of the relationship but will quickly find themselves beating their head and heart futilely against the proverbial cold brick wall of an emotionally distant or unavailable “Dom.” In the end, such a relationship will be frustrating and unfulfilling at best and more likely outright heartbreaking. Anyone contemplating entering a D/s relationship as a Dom needs to be aware of the emotional neediness that can be anticipated in such a relationship and be capable of and prepared to handle the awesome responsibility that goes with it. Similarly, a submissive should be just as aware of their level of neediness and ensure that the Dom they choose is both capable of and willing to support and nurture those needs.
A submissive opens their heart, mind and soul to their Dominant and hands them over in the belief that they will be controlled responsibly and treated gently and tenderly. You may have full permission to beat on a submissives’ ass but it is rightly expected that you will simultaneously hold their heart and emotions safely and tenderly.
This is the essence of D/s as I see it. It is a deeply trusting and interdependent relationship that takes extraordinary levels of care and responsibility to carry out successfully. It can be a very demanding and inwardly focussed relationship in which the Dom and sub place one another squarely in the center of each others’ universe, the center of each others’ attention. It is a lot of work and a lot of responsibility, but I would have it no other way.
Caption © For The Love of a Submissive, 2012
Image Credit Unknown

fortheloveofasub:

Center of Attention

One of the appealing aspects of being a submissive is the attention that a Dom showers on their sub. It is often said that submissives require more attention and can be needier than the average person. This has been true in my experience but it is not necessarily a bad thing in the context of a D/s relationship. Indeed, it could be argued that the dependence a submissive feels on their Dom dovetails perfectly with the fact that at the heart of Dominance is a desire to be needed and looked to for support, guidance and security. In essence, the Dom needs to be needed. D/s is after all a symbiotic relationship between two people on many levels.

It has also been my observation that many submissives do not like being in the spotlight in any public sense and would rather slip into the background in a crowd rather the seek attention or adulation. Yet in private with their Dom, they are in point of fact very much in the spotlight. They are the sole focus of a Dominant’s attention, words and actions. The Dom’s world revolves around the sub for at least a time and the submissive revels in this attention and seeks still more in their efforts to serve and be pleasing. The glare of the white hot spotlight of their Dom is deeply appealing and gratifying to the submissive.

The term neediness is often used to describe a negative trait in a relationship, something that should be stamped out. And yet, in the context of a D/s relationship it is not always a bad thing at all. A Dom very much needs a submissive and a sub very much needs a Dom. Without the other, they cannot fulfill their desires or their destiny. They do not feel whole. However, if neediness is motivated by negative traits and emotions such as jealously, insecurity, or a fear of rejection, then neediness takes on a very negative connotation with consequent destructive impact on the relationship. It is always good to check your motives and guard against sabataging behaviors.

As a Dom, I like to be needed and I desire very much the attention and devotion that a submissive has to offer. I feed on that energy and return it in kind by devoting my full and undivided attention to my submissive in the form of acceptance, structure and loving control, giving her precisely what she needs in return. I can be just as needy as any submissive in my own way…it is simply expressed differently.

Where this all falls apart is when a so-called Dom enters into a D/s relationship under the belief that it is solely sexual in nature, seeking only the physical manifestations of BDSM without supporting the emotional and psychological aspects of the relationship. This is a recipe for disaster and heartbreak. A needy submissive might initially feel a sense of being accepted and supported during the sexual aspects of the relationship but will quickly find themselves beating their head and heart futilely against the proverbial cold brick wall of an emotionally distant or unavailable “Dom.” In the end, such a relationship will be frustrating and unfulfilling at best and more likely outright heartbreaking. Anyone contemplating entering a D/s relationship as a Dom needs to be aware of the emotional neediness that can be anticipated in such a relationship and be capable of and prepared to handle the awesome responsibility that goes with it. Similarly, a submissive should be just as aware of their level of neediness and ensure that the Dom they choose is both capable of and willing to support and nurture those needs.

A submissive opens their heart, mind and soul to their Dominant and hands them over in the belief that they will be controlled responsibly and treated gently and tenderly. You may have full permission to beat on a submissives’ ass but it is rightly expected that you will simultaneously hold their heart and emotions safely and tenderly.

This is the essence of D/s as I see it. It is a deeply trusting and interdependent relationship that takes extraordinary levels of care and responsibility to carry out successfully. It can be a very demanding and inwardly focussed relationship in which the Dom and sub place one another squarely in the center of each others’ universe, the center of each others’ attention. It is a lot of work and a lot of responsibility, but I would have it no other way.

Caption © For The Love of a Submissive, 2012

Image Credit Unknown

luciasmaster:

Spread yourself wide for me. You do not have the option to shield your sensitive flesh from me.

luciasmaster:

Spread yourself wide for me. You do not have the option to shield your sensitive flesh from me.